Most of the health messages we see are about losing weight, consuming less, detoxing and fasting, but for many women the key to a healthy body and mind is actually a matter of gaining some weight.

I spent years restricting my food and working out a lot, doing hard-core cardio every day. It was only when I went off the pill, to let my body just do it’s natural thing that I realized I had a serious problem. After a year I still had no cycle. I did every test out there, and no one could give me a medical reason as to why it went missing. I was 27 and terrified that I wouldn’t be able to have kids. This scare was a  blessing because it’s what it took to snap out of a life of self-deprivation.

My doctor told me, I could try putting on weight, so I gradually started to consciously eat more. I now have a trainer who focuses on getting “strong”, I walked a lot, meditated and worked on reducing anxiety.

Then finally, a beautiful miracle of nature occurred and I  “got it back”. Seriously, I welcome it now!

It’s a story so many of you are living, but you feel very alone. It’s not easy to gain weight while the whole world seems to be trying so hard to do the opposite. People are complemented for dropping weight, but what do people say when you put it on? Usually they’ll say nothing at all or, you look “strong”,  at first you will take this the wrong way, because you’re so used to being called “skinny” or “tiny”.

You have to be your own coach with this one. Enjoy your boyfriend, touching your butt more, because now you actually have one, high five yourself when your hair is feeling thicker and your eyes are brighter, smile to yourself when you’re no longer a tired zombie in the afternoons, you don’t snap at those you love because you’re constantly “hangry”, congratulate yourself when your relationships are better and your social life is exciting because you are no longer fretting about food 24/7. Enjoy feeling like the sexy healthy women God specifically designed you to be!

While this all sounds delicious, the process isn’t a straight path. You’re old judgy, restrictive, disordered thinking will creep back in, or you might even gain more weight than you’re comfortable with before you finally reach your happy place.

The biggest difference I’ve noticed is, as I’ve become softer, my whole life has softened around me. Now that I have more self-compassion, the world is just kinder to me. It’s the rule of attraction.

If you think this is you, consider being a rebel against the health and weight-loss industry and listen your body instead. It will thank you in more ways than you can imagine.

Stay Well.